H E L P!! Something stole my brain, and I want it back!
- 04-16-2009, 06:13 PM
H E L P!! Something stole my brain, and I want it back!
I recently went off a medication, and after a horrible time with withdrawls, I'm back to "normal". There is one MAJOR problem.... I'm having the hardest time motivating.On top of that, my appetite has been out of control.
I used to get up, go to the gym and then on with my day- but now I get up, and put off going to the gym until later. Usually I dont eat before workouts, but with this appetite, I'm eating before-which pushes the time to workout back for my stomach to empty. WHAT THE ????????????
I'm guessing its somewhat hormonal, due to the way things were during the horrendous withdrawal.
But this is not like me. It's like I'm watching myself slack, and not being able to pull my head out and stop this! I've worked really hard to get here, and dont want to ruin it.
Has anyone ever experienced anything similar? What should I do, what can I do?
I feel kinda asking for advice on this because it seems so easy- but I'm telling you, it is not easy for me right now...so I appreciate your help.
- 04-16-2009, 06:41 PM
04-16-2009, 06:51 PM
04-16-2009, 07:17 PM
That sucks. Benzo's withdrawl is a physical addiction (as I'm sure your aware) so your body probably needs to 'reset' back to where you were. Try and go to the gym at the same time everyday, or at least go for a jog every day at the same time. Repetition and schedules help refocus your mind after having to deal with withdrawl, from my experience.
04-16-2009, 07:28 PM
Thank you so much.
I have never been through something so horrible, and now I have a new outlook on meds. I dont ever want to repeat that again, nor do I wish anyone to go through that!
I looked it up, benzopine withdrawal syndrome, and was shocked at now scary it really was.
That is a good suggestion, that I never would have thought of about repetition. I will do it. I'm super concerned about gaining bodyfat back- You mention you're experience with this, did you see the same symptoms?
04-16-2009, 11:46 PM
The appetite and lack of motivation are all directly linked to the meds. It may help to know that its not your specific lack of motivation, but the fact that your body's still freaking out. Like you said, Benzo withdrawl is a scary thing, It never ceases to amaze my how drugs get prescribed like so much candy, without much thought for the repercussion.
this might help some. http://benzowithdrawal.com/forum/ I found alot of answers there. Dont feel like your alone.
04-17-2009, 12:04 AM
find a routine, and stick with it. you may find that exercise releases the same "feel good" endorphins, which makes everything a little better - similar to the "runners high". find things that make you feel good that are healthy - a hot tub sometimes can be a blessing.
while not knowing addiction to valium first hand, i can tell you that's what my g/f did while withdrawing from oxycontin and valium (and others). hope that helps in any way.
04-17-2009, 12:46 AM
Get a workout partner and lean on them for a little while. Tell them your predicament and they may be able to help you out. Sometimes those chemical withdrawals will feel like they override your normal thoughts and functions. Stick it out. Keep us updated. Sometimes just writing things out can calm me and give me motivation.
04-17-2009, 03:32 AM
Ive been on all kinds of benzo's from a young age due to being confined to a wheelchair from 6-12 years old, the impact on my life was bigger than i give it credit for.
Withdrawral from these things is huge, rebound is massive, i have to ask, was it a docs decision to take you off or your own?
Can you explain a little why you were perscribed them?
Although rebound has physical implications, some might argue the greatest impact is on the mind; your crutch has been kicked from under you.
04-17-2009, 05:04 PM
When my Dr found out, he was really concerned- seeing as he would not have done things that way. So now, I refuse to take the xnanax or go back to the any benzo.
My mind is freaking me out!!! I dont know where my self discipline went. I'm so scared that ts going to ruin my level of fitness and phsysical stats. (weight gain, endurance)
The idea of writing it out helps, and once I get to the gym, I have more motivation, but still find myself self defeating.
I think I'm going to clear all food out of my house-lol. My eating habits are completley thrown off course, and off timing. I must fix it somehow.
04-18-2009, 09:27 PM
Keep working at it! Start a workout log. I would subscribe and post feedback and I am sure a bunch of other AM junkies would too.
04-21-2009, 08:17 AM
I can only tell you the truth, the road back is twice as long and hard as the road there; but at least its not a one way ticket.
I have been through extreme changes in my life, spent 6 years in a wheel chair (end at 330lbs+) dieted hard, built upto running 10-12miles per day got down to 160-170lbs (im 6ft 2) and totally shredded, maximum 7% bodyfat, had a car accident nearly severed my spine, hospital time - bed ridden - rehab - depression - anxiety - tons of medication - suicide watch =
Suddenly after everything i had been through, i was back at nearly the exact same weight as when i got out of the wheelchair, only now i was on a ton of medication which made it impossible to focus, stay awake and concentrate on getting a good diet going.
My mind and body was destroyed ( i thought ).
But here i am, down to just one medication, squatting, cleaning and deadlifting, training MMA and muay thai full time and down almost 100lbs. I aim and will be down to 220lbs by summer time but this time with a ton more muscle and conditioning, this time im built to go not just built for show.
Just remember things are never as good as they might seem, thats true, but they are never as bad either.
04-21-2009, 12:49 PM
The tricks it allows the mind to play are amazing.
I'm doing a little better- now just trying not to stress out about the bf% as much. Trying to control the appetite and get validity that I'm at least maintaining is hard- since I'm pretty much on my own most of the time.
My biggest question is-
At what rate is the worst case scenario that my bf% could raise? I was consistently maintaining a 11%, but wanting it down to 9%.
The only thing to do is to keep going. I know I believe there is no stopping- this devil in my mind set is stalling, and it's trying to get rid of thinking that way is the most difficult part.
I really wonder if I should find a "boot camp" somewhere... lol
04-21-2009, 02:35 PM
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