I eat clean almost every single day, where I don't eat any fast foods or anything. . The rest of the time its Chicken and broccoli and brown rice.
Today I was driving around for lunch and pulled into a parking lot of a pizza place. I sat there with the car ignition off for a couple minutes and pondered if I should walk in and eat the pizza or not. Like I was some junkie sitting in front of a bar and making the decision of falling off the wagon again. I mean wtf is wrong with me that I don't even think I can eat pizza anymore because I want to have an 8 pack and perfectly rounded pecs?
I really think this is becoming unhealthy for me. I am about to say **** this sport and just go to the gym and lift and say **** it. Its a love hate relationship. I love how lifting makes me feel, I love eating healthy foods, But at the same time actually feeling like I can't go to a pizza buffet once in a while without ruining my gains? Even if I did have a cheeseburger on Saturday night with fries? WTF is that? Maybe I will take up powerlifting instead cause having to do what I did today where I almost drove myself crazy is not healthy mentally.Powerlifters don't worry about anything but getting stronger! My main focus right now is to gain strength and mass so what the **** am I worrying about going to a pizza buffet for once in a while? Beating myself up over a sport that I don't even make a living at ,