Mashed Needs help on getting over his wife

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  1. lmao t-bone, thanks for that.

    Thank you so much guys. Im finding the inner strength to stand against this, but my heart and brain are constantly battling, emotions vs logic.

    She keeps messing with my mind, her messages go from sweet, to hate, to sweet, to hate.

    What the hell?! This is a case of i want my cake and to eat it. She wants everything, but in the end she will have nothing.

    Damnit man, what gets me most is when she justifies her behavior. Right.....

    Thanks so much guys, your continued support is really helping have the strenght to battle this. The sex swing is in (puerley for aesthetic reasons haha), gucci bags are out.


  2. i'm in for the support........

    i don't think i can add any more than whats been said. But, i am here for ya! I am SO GLAD i offered you the 3-AD! POUND THE FUKCING WEIGHTS, BRO!
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  3. Quote Originally Posted by MashedPotato View Post
    lmao t-bone, thanks for that.

    Thank you so much guys. Im finding the inner strength to stand against this, but my heart and brain are constantly battling, emotions vs logic.

    She keeps messing with my mind, her messages go from sweet, to hate, to sweet, to hate.

    What the hell?! This is a case of i want my cake and to eat it. She wants everything, but in the end she will have nothing.

    Damnit man, what gets me most is when she justifies her behavior. Right.....

    Thanks so much guys, your continued support is really helping have the strenght to battle this. The sex swing is in (puerley for aesthetic reasons haha), gucci bags are out.


    If she is messing with you, change your number, you dont need the rollar coaster ride, have all contact through a lawyer, time is the only thing, be busy.....I myself find, working 3 jobs, school and the gym a EXCELLENT way to heal the heart......

    But seriously, good luck And remember someday, someone is going to love you for you......just be aware, dont let one A** spoil it for someone who will love you for you...........

    (((HUGZ))))

    TC
    RIP Ryan, :(

  4. Quote Originally Posted by toughchick401 View Post
    If she is messing with you, change your number, you dont need the rollar coaster ride, have all contact through a lawyer, time is the only thing, be busy.....I myself find, working 3 jobs, school and the gym a EXCELLENT way to heal the heart......

    But seriously, good luck And remember someday, someone is going to love you for you......just be aware, dont let one A** spoil it for someone who will love you for you...........

    (((HUGZ))))

    TC
    Very solid advice TC!

    Evolutionary Muse - Inspire to Evolve
    Legendary


  5. Keep your head up Mashed. Don't ever feel like you did something wrong. I don't condone treating girls like sh*t, but this should make you feel better.
    [nomedia="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z6V9j5qHEqY"]YouTube - Broadcast Yourself.[/nomedia]
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  6. [nomedia="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dSJxvi767kQ"]YouTube - Broadcast Yourself.[/nomedia]
    Here's another video to make you smile. I don't disrespect women, but this seems like it will at least make you laugh.

  7. Quote Originally Posted by MashedPotato View Post
    Hey guys,

    As some of you may know things have happened between me and my wife. Without going into details, how the hell do you get over someone you love who doesnt love you back.

    This is driving me crazy, everything in our home reminds me of her, everything i do, i see or hear. Shes now having feelings for a mutual friend of ours, we hadnt even split up, so this is real hard on me. I know where she is right at this moment, in a hotel, in the same bed, and kissing this guy.

    I need help. This is hard guys. Real hard.

    Thanks guys
    Bro this is gonna sound silly I know...I've been around a long-assed time (I'm 41)...I've seen a lot of guys suffer from break ups.

    The quickest most thorough way to get rid of those thoughts & feelings about your soon to be ex-wife is this....you MUST get the scent of another woman on your body. I mean that literally. There is something about having sex with a woman and taking in her essence that changes you chemically...it rewires the brain a bit...creates mild attachment to the new woman and reduces attachement to the old woman.

    This doesn't by any stretch of the imagination wipe out the memory of feeling you had (or may still have) for you "old woman" but it will dampen down the intensity. You will not think about her constantly and when you do it won't be as intense because chemically you have bonded with someone else.

    I'm not talking about getting a new girlfriend...take your time with that. I'm talking about a sexual encounter(s) with another woman...get her to sweat some and then rub it on yourself... Trust me on that.

  8. Quote Originally Posted by Gtarzan81 View Post
    Mashed and myself live close to eachother. Found that out about a week ago.
    I foresee some hanging out, and the clanking of heavy weights.
    Stick close to him. He'll need a friend now more than ever.

    You can help him out more than anyone else.

  9. Quote Originally Posted by datBtrue View Post
    Bro this is gonna sound silly I know...I've been around a long-assed time (I'm 41)...I've seen a lot of guys suffer from break ups.

    The quickest most thorough way to get rid of those thoughts & feelings about your soon to be ex-wife is this....you MUST get the scent of another woman on your body. I mean that literally. There is something about having sex with a woman and taking in her essence that changes you chemically...it rewires the brain a bit...creates mild attachment to the new woman and reduces attachement to the old woman.

    This doesn't by any stretch of the imagination wipe out the memory of feeling you had (or may still have) for you "old woman" but it will dampen down the intensity. You will not think about her constantly and when you do it won't be as intense because chemically you have bonded with someone else.

    I'm not talking about getting a new girlfriend...take your time with that. I'm talking about a sexual encounter(s) with another woman...get her to sweat some and then rub it on yourself... Trust me on that.

    This is so true. I went thru a pretty hard brakeup and while it was me who ended it, it needed to be done it was still so hard. Everything reminded me of her, smells, songs, food, EVERYTHING, even the damn gym! Found myself a new lady in school and we both just clicked, didnt date, didnt have sex for 6 months BUT the smell of her and everything changed me so much and made it that much easier.

    Also definately guys, if you live close get some workout time in especialy under the iron. The gym has always been my "home" away from home so to speak when i have problems with the lady friend. Stick in there taters and were here for ya man!
    E-Pharm Rep... PM me with any questions or concerns

  10. Quote Originally Posted by datBtrue View Post
    Bro this is gonna sound silly I know...I've been around a long-assed time (I'm 41)...I've seen a lot of guys suffer from break ups.

    The quickest most thorough way to get rid of those thoughts & feelings about your soon to be ex-wife is this....you MUST get the scent of another woman on your body. I mean that literally. There is something about having sex with a woman and taking in her essence that changes you chemically...it rewires the brain a bit...creates mild attachment to the new woman and reduces attachement to the old woman.

    This doesn't by any stretch of the imagination wipe out the memory of feeling you had (or may still have) for you "old woman" but it will dampen down the intensity. You will not think about her constantly and when you do it won't be as intense because chemically you have bonded with someone else.

    I'm not talking about getting a new girlfriend...take your time with that. I'm talking about a sexual encounter(s) with another woman...get her to sweat some and then rub it on yourself... Trust me on that.
    Well your method definately sounds like the most fun

  11. Datbrut hit it right on the head all nice and PC like.. so I will give the old non pc saying below

    The old saying, " nothing gets you over old P U S S Y like New P U S S Y".... :chick: No offense to any womens..

  12. Quote Originally Posted by datBtrue;
    ...I'm talking about a sexual encounter(s) with another woman...get her to sweat some and then rub it on yourself... Trust me on that.
    Depending on one's emotional state of attachment, this might need something like Aspire36 to implement. The first one or two encounters, at least.
    Product Educator | USPowders
    Statements made by this online persona are the sole property of the owner, and do not necessarily reflect USPowdersí opinion as a whole.

  13. Quote Originally Posted by jmh80 View Post
    Stick close to him. He'll need a friend now more than ever.

    You can help him out more than anyone else.
    Thanks for that. I will try. We live about 1/2 hour apart here in the Dallas area.
    We hung out and had a few beers last night. He's a good guy. Too good of one to deserve this ****e happening to him.

  14. Mashed, keep strong no matter what. It's something everyone goes through at some point, and I got mine ..trust!. You are a funny ass dude, and a great addition to Anabolic Minds. Family guy is perhaps the best show in the world to laugh like a school girl....Trauma, and I can agreee here!!! Hit that 3-ad bro, and pound the weights!!!!!!

    ~Trip
    The LORD is my rock, my fortress, and my savior; my God is my rock, in whom I find protection. He is my shield, the power that saves me, and my place of safety.-Psalm 18:2

  15. Here's what has helped me with recent breakups:

    1. Spoil yourself (go shopping)
    2. Buy pheromones (smell nice & attract women)
    3. Run a cycle (either natty or not ... get your confidence and endorphins going)
    4. Go on dates
    5. Realize that everything happens for a reason. There's probably a hot woman out there right now waiting to get some mashedpotato on her plate.
    :clean:

    Stay strong bro, we're all here for you.

  16. Quote Originally Posted by RenegadeRows View Post
    There's probably a hot woman out there right now waiting to get some mashedpotato on her plate.
    :clean:
    LOL This is good one.

  17. There is not too much I can say to make it better. But I would cut off all contact with her. Get a lawyer now so you can get it over with. Keep your self busy and keep friends around. And we are all here if you need us...

  18. Quote Originally Posted by crader View Post
    There is not too much I can say to make it better. But I would cut off all contact with her. Get a lawyer now so you can get it over with. Keep your self busy and keep friends around. And we are all here if you need us...
    Good advice here!

  19. All solid advice already given: block her out and participate in casual sex with new *****.

    Do you have any super trusted friends or family? You might want to consider "giving" them certain important items from your home as well as "pay back" that loan you took from them before letting her know you know about her or your intentions, etc.

    She owns half of your stuff now - yes, including your sports supplements and comic book collection from when you were 12.

    My dad used to collect beer cans from all over the world. When he divorced, my mother claimed she wanted them (out of spite) - and essentially forced my dad to pay $1000 for something he collected before getting married to her. She had moved several of her "items" before all this while he was at work - I may hate my mother but I guess I inherited her evil thoughts and self-preservation skills. My father got raped so bad in court it wasn't even funny. Protect yourself 1st and DO NOT CARE ABOUT HER FEELINGS. Trust me on this. Sorry to offend the opposite sex, but women are generally superior to men when it comes to emotional manipulation and are usually a few steps ahead of you when it comes to the end of a relationship. She's already been talking and scheming with her friends long ago, while males generally try to keep it private and handle it themselves - which is the worst thing to do. (Luckily you already took a step when you posted here).

    Just like when taking anything that manipulates hormones, proper PCT should be on hand. You need the same backup/recovery plan for this. Which also reminds me - any evidence of any "illegal" or "suspicious" fitness items should be removed from your place ASAP or you may find yourself defending your roid rage in court against physical evidence of such drugs... "He was never the same after taking this your honor. I was so scared - I thought he was going to hit me. He gets mad so easily I had to leave for my own safety, etc"

    Once lawyers get involved and assessments are made - bye bye. But it's more difficult to lose what you don't have and don't know where it went. I read a story once where the hero takes the day off of work and moves his important items, then changes the locks and accuses her of stealing the stuff...

    I'd also make sure you keep your focus and intensity in the gym and NOT fall into the wallow in self pity trap - which can be easy to fall into.

    Best of luck to you! After you have all those affairs in order, make sure you have a few wingmen that will take you out. Try to have a few wing girls too - they always make a guy look "safer". Time heals all wounds - you need as many distractions as you can to survive the most painful of those times.

  20. THANK YOU SO MUCH EVERYONE (and GT especially ).

    I spent the past 4 days wallowing in self pity, but today i feel so much better - albeit incredibly depressed, hurt and lonely, but most of the frustration has gone.

    To summarize my wife has, since I have known her and for several years before suffered from severe depression. She would occasionaly have bouts of mania (increased urge to spend money on bags, clothes etc), but I always took care of her, no matter what.

    Now however I feel she has hit a new state of mania. She does not care about anyone, she desires to spend sooo much money, she talks about life and trees and wind etc....how beautiful everything is, yet she cannot see the consiquences of her actions. I feel so angry at her, yet so hurt that she is like this. It really isnt her fault, yet I cannot forgive her.

    This guy she is with, even had the nerve to send me messages about how she needed love and how to treat her, etc! WTF! he knows nothing about my wife, he was my friend, he knew we were married and he still persued there relationship. Not only that I find out my wife has paid for everything since they have "had relations", he pays for nothing. Apparently he has "no money". Not only that, he lies (i have 7% bf....ugh yeh sure you do bud) He even told me he had a 3 yr girlfriend which is not true. Yet my wife accepts his lies and pardons him, yet she never accepts anyones lies, no matter the reason.

    I cannot for the life of me understand why she is with him. Hes disrespectful (he knew we were married), hes a scrub and he lies. I see my wife and she is euphoric, shes not the same. I pray to god that this ends quickly as its tearing me apart. Not only because i love her, but because i have cared for her for so long.

    Guys i dont know what to do. This isnt as easy as saying my wife cheated on me, she is incapable of thinking logically right now, she has no negative emotions. What do i do. Why is she with this guy?

    She still expects to come home to me every day and for me to care for her. NO ONE understands her guys except me. I have emailed both of her doctors (pyschologist and pysciatrist (sp?)) and they also think she has mania.

    What do i do guys. She is not herself, she is someone else inside my wifes body and soul.

    MANIA:

    Symptoms of mania include

    rapid speech,
    racing thoughts
    decreased need for sleep
    hypersexuality,
    euphoria,
    grandiosityincreased interest in goal-directed activities

    My wife has all the bold items. She doesnt see her mania and thinks she is really, really into this guy. What do i do? Each day that passes it gets harder. He wont be there for her when she falls back down, only i know how to help her. Its soo hard guys it really is. Normally she is the most sweetest, loyal, caring and full of high values person you will ever meet. But now she is cold and heartless and can only think about herself.

  21. Quote Originally Posted by MashedPotato View Post
    THANK YOU SO MUCH EVERYONE (and GT especially ).

    I spent the past 4 days wallowing in self pity, but today i feel so much better - albeit incredibly depressed, hurt and lonely, but most of the frustration has gone.

    To summarize my wife has, since I have known her and for several years before suffered from severe depression. She would occasionaly have bouts of mania (increased urge to spend money on bags, clothes etc), but I always took care of her, no matter what.

    Now however I feel she has hit a new state of mania. She does not care about anyone, she desires to spend sooo much money, she talks about life and trees and wind etc....how beautiful everything is, yet she cannot see the consiquences of her actions. I feel so angry at her, yet so hurt that she is like this. It really isnt her fault, yet I cannot forgive her.

    This guy she is with, even had the nerve to send me messages about how she needed love and how to treat her, etc! WTF! he knows nothing about my wife, he was my friend, he knew we were married and he still persued there relationship. Not only that I find out my wife has paid for everything since they have "had relations", he pays for nothing. Apparently he has "no money". Not only that, he lies (i have 7% bf....ugh yeh sure you do bud) He even told me he had a 3 yr girlfriend which is not true. Yet my wife accepts his lies and pardons him, yet she never accepts anyones lies, no matter the reason.

    I cannot for the life of me understand why she is with him. Hes disrespectful (he knew we were married), hes a scrub and he lies. I see my wife and she is euphoric, shes not the same. I pray to god that this ends quickly as its tearing me apart. Not only because i love her, but because i have cared for her for so long.

    Guys i dont know what to do. This isnt as easy as saying my wife cheated on me, she is incapable of thinking logically right now, she has no negative emotions. What do i do. Why is she with this guy?

    She still expects to come home to me every day and for me to care for her. NO ONE understands her guys except me. I have emailed both of her doctors (pyschologist and pysciatrist (sp?)) and they also think she has mania.

    What do i do guys. She is not herself, she is someone else inside my wifes body and soul.

    MANIA:

    Symptoms of mania include

    rapid speech,
    racing thoughts
    decreased need for sleep
    hypersexuality,
    euphoria,
    grandiosityincreased interest in goal-directed activities

    My wife has all the bold items. She doesnt see her mania and thinks she is really, really into this guy. What do i do? Each day that passes it gets harder. He wont be there for her when she falls back down, only i know how to help her. Its soo hard guys it really is. Normally she is the most sweetest, loyal, caring and full of high values person you will ever meet. But now she is cold and heartless and can only think about herself.
    Mash, it seems that she may in fact have issues with making rational decisions, and understanding that. If a person has a unstable pshyce, they are probably fighting a war with themselves everyday. Don't think less of yourself because someone else(even a very close person) may have a instability. You did nothing wrong here is the take home message.....it's out of your hands at this point. Loose contact is strongly advised!
    The LORD is my rock, my fortress, and my savior; my God is my rock, in whom I find protection. He is my shield, the power that saves me, and my place of safety.-Psalm 18:2

  22. Quote Originally Posted by MashedPotato View Post
    What do i do guys. She is not herself, she is someone else inside my wifes body and soul.
    Biologically, all we are is the sum of a bunch of chemical reactions, if she is changing her personality quickly it could be just the start of what (bad) is to come. You mentioned that she is under a psychiatrist's care so let them handle it. Odds are she will never again be the person you used to know. If you don't disassociate yourself from her problems she will drag you down also. I suppose, easier said than done, I couldn't imagine being in your place so I do sympathize.

    Beta blockers and meditation may help to cut the emotional response from your memories but try other avenues first. Meditation itself can be extremely useful, here is a good start if you wish to explore: http://mindandmuscle.net/articles/sc...lieving_stress

  23. Mashed...look at it this way. If your stats are right, you are only 23. Not even close to your physical/spiritual/intellectual prime. Just think how much it would suck if you gave her the best years of your life and THEN this all happened. Go out and make you some sweet lovin' and whatever you do, don't jump back into a relationship. Find your zen. Find yourself. Find some cheap sleazy sex, and then when you feel whole again go find a real woman.

    p.s. I got into working out from a similar situation...only I was fourteen. I told myself I would do pushups every time I thought of her until I could forget. I wanted to make her jealous so badly that I wound up finding something that has given me far more satisfaction than a silly adolescent relationship. Many are the roads and convoluted are the paths that lead us to our destiny.

  24. Quote Originally Posted by MashedPotato View Post
    She still expects to come home to me every day and for me to care for her.
    its time to move out then mashed, let her come home to an empty place.

  25. I dont know what to tell you bro, and I do have a degree in psychology, so I know more about mania than most. Whatever you decide bro, I got your back. If you need to hit my couch, hit a bar, hit the iron, get out of town for a few days, I got your back.

    oh ya....some of us are playing paintball on Saturday...your invited.

    Edit: an austin road trip isisnt a bad idea either.
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