Who has the funniest Gym story?

[Mach .78]

The only reason I started this thread is because of what I heard and witnessed at the gym today. You guys may not find it all that funny but I thought it was hilarious.

So I'm sitting in the hot tub talking to this guy about the Mayweather/De La Hoya fight, It went 12 rounds, Mayweather won by split decision, yada,yada,yada. This other guy who just sat down, proceeds to tell us that De La Hoya won in three rounds by knocking Mayweather out, there was blood all over the place. The other guy looks at him and says, Are you sure? He says, yea. I'm like, wait a minute. The fight went 12 rounds and Mayweather looked like he was typing on De La Hoya. He's like no, no, I went to the store real quick and when I came back, it was over. I'm like, Are you talking about the fight they JUST had in Vegas? He says yea. The guy gets out of the hot tub to rinse off. The other guy looks at me and says, he says they only went 3 rounds and I whisper "And he's wrong." So as I'm toweling off, this guy walks over to where I am to get his stuff, mumbles "Have a good day" And as I'm saying "You too" this guys walks and disappears into the Womens locker room.


Now you may have seen this happen at your gym a time or two. Oh this guy will be back out in 30 seconds or less. That's when I heard the shower turn on, I'm like........oh no.

I go into the "Mens side" and patiently watch for this guy to appear, he never did unless I was looking away for a moment. Can you imagine how he finally figured it out?

 

[Chad]

me...........

 

[Mach .78]

me............meaning you have the funniest gym story?

 

[Chad]

me............meaning you have the funniest gym story?

yup. hahaha. sorry bro. im to lazy to type it out. i did like your story tho!

 

[Mach .78]

Oh, That ain't right! Post it when you've downed a couple cups of coffee, I want to read it.

 

[Chad]

Oh, That ain't right! Post it when you've downed a couple cups of coffee, I want to read it.

ok ill try to get it done after i put my son to bed

 

[TheMyth]

Long story short, this guy was lifting the 150lb's and when he went to put them back he apparently did not have his judgement as to where his penis was because when he put it back he clipped it so hard that it seared it off and there was blood EVERYWHERE, the guy was shreaking like a girl and was on the floor kicking and screaming. I know this because I was training a lady right next to him and could sense something was going to go wrong. I called 911 from my cell and had them out there. They bagged up his penis on ice but I don't think it was gonna be put back on because it looked destroyed. Too bad for him, guy was pretty hung! Guess it doesn't pay to be that hung!

 

[Iron Warrior]

I saw a 500-600 (maybe more?) pound dude in the gym curling 10 pounds. . . I thought that was hilarious LOL.

 

[Rogue Drone]

You know the wrinkled old dudes that walk around naked everywhere in the locker room, every gym has one or ten?

My resident geriatric shameless raisan is in the habit of bending far over naked in the men's restroom, holding his buttcheeks apart and drying his asscrack with the hand dryer, that's funny and weird to me.

Oh, and he gums the Entemann's coffee cakes he brings in, leaving a pile of spit sodden crumbs at his feet.

Someday, that may be us :blink:

People flying backwards off a treadmill, that' a hoot.

 

[warnerve]

Long story short, this guy was lifting the 150lb's and when he went to put them back he apparently did not have his judgement as to where his penis was because when he put it back he clipped it so hard that it seared it off and there was blood EVERYWHERE, the guy was shreaking like a girl and was on the floor kicking and screaming. I know this because I was training a lady right next to him and could sense something was going to go wrong. I called 911 from my cell and had them out there. They bagged up his penis on ice but I don't think it was gonna be put back on because it looked destroyed. Too bad for him, guy was pretty hung! Guess it doesn't pay to be that hung!

How long ago was it? If it's still usable I am in the market for an upgrade :woohoo:

 

[Mach .78]

With the exception of The Myths penis compactor story,OMG, I have seen these scenarios at my gym. What's up with that? For example, one of my old dudes props his leg up on the counter at the sink "naked", like he is going to tie his shoe, He doesn't have shoes on! What the hell is that?

I like when people drop their cell phones on the treadmills, they look down between their legs to see where it went. I told this guy one day, that if I had a video camera, that would have made a great commercial. He didn't think that was too funny. I of course, did.

Rogue, please snap a pic with your cellphone of that dude blowdrying his ass, please. Anybody for that matter, if it's funny pretend your messing with your phone and snap it, wait....is that legal? whatever.

So did that dudes penis hit the floor? Damn, I can see how that would happen, not to me of course because I'm a grower thank God.

Everybody has the dude at the gym with the weird lifting groans but do you have a woman? This woman groaned one day and the hair stood up on the back of my neck.:think: What the......that sounds like an Orgasm. She needs to find a quieter way of doing that, for her sake. The entire gym just stopped.

These are great, keep them coming.

 

[warnerve]

the naked old dudes have been there at every gym i have ever been to with the exception of at my college. I have heard plenty of moaners, some strong, some not so much. Never a woman though, it'd prob distract me too much

 

[TheMyth]

How long ago was it? If it's still usable I am in the market for an upgrade :woohoo:

haha trust me you wouldn't have wanted it, it was messed up. It happened 6 years ago.

 

[TheMyth]

With the exception of The Myths penis compactor story,OMG, I have seen these scenarios at my gym. What's up with that? For example, one of my old dudes props his leg up on the counter at the sink "naked", like he is going to tie his shoe, He doesn't have shoes on! What the hell is that?

I like when people drop their cell phones on the treadmills, they look down between their legs to see where it went. I told this guy one day, that if I had a video camera, that would have made a great commercial. He didn't think that was too funny. I of course, did.

Rogue, please snap a pic with your cellphone of that dude blowdrying his ass, please. Anybody for that matter, if it's funny pretend your messing with your phone and snap it, wait....is that legal? whatever.

So did that dudes penis hit the floor? Damn, I can see how that would happen, not to me of course because I'm a grower thank God.

Everybody has the dude at the gym with the weird lifting groans but do you have a woman? This woman groaned one day and the hair stood up on the back of my neck.:think: What the......that sounds like an Orgasm. She needs to find a quieter way of doing that, for her sake. The entire gym just stopped.

These are great, keep them coming.

Yup, chopped it right off and fell out of his shorts. It was crazy!