xxtruxx1
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Ok, first of all I'd like to apologize for the length of this post. If it ends up being extremely long, keep in mind I had to shrink 2 & a half years into this post. I'll try my best to make it quick & painless for the readers so bare with me guys. Here we go.
I was with my ex gf for 2 & a half years. When we met everything was great (the honeymoon stage). We met right before I left to school at UF in Gainesville, FL. She's a year younger than me so she was satying in Miami, FL. We were together for 4 months before I left & everything was amazing. When we met & started talking she told me she had cheated on all her bf's before (I think it was 3 of them). Nothing really serious, just a kiss or scam or w/e with another guy while going out with her bf. I knew her most recent ex Carlos because he went to my high school. They were together for 10 months but when her & me got together, she hated him & told me about their relationship which made me hate him too (things like he almost hit her a few times etc). I went to UF, we stayed together & did the long distance hoping that when the time came she'd come up too. For a year I went up & down between Gainesville & Miami to be with her & spend weekends & stuff (I even missed the UF vs LSU game to surprise her for her birthday). I was seriously the "ideal" bf to this girl. I mean, even her friends told her, Lindsey, this kid is amazing, I wish I had a bf like that. She would always tell me how great of a bf I was, how much she loved me, how lucky she was, how I was her Noah (the guy from The Notebook), & all that kind of crap. I fell in love with her too, & loved & cared for her a hell of a lot. I considered her my best friend second to only my family then followed by my 2 best guy friends since I was 3 yrs old. She was with me through my dad's heart surgeries & mom's breast cancer & surgeries & I was with her through her mom's alcoholism & rehab. Basically, we were everything to each other. She felt like I was it, the one, the real deal & I felt like she was too. While we were apart, Carlos began telling her how much he had changed from when he was with her & how he wanted a friendship with her. I was against it but I told her it was her decision & that as soon as any funny business happened, it was over. They would talk & hang out occasionally & her & me fought a lot about him. She ended up calling it off cause it was getting to a point where she felt like she had to choose between him & me.
As luck would have it, she ended up going to Chicago instead of Gainesville. When she was leaving we decided to do the distance again. I was fine with it because to me its the same thing no matter where she is as long as its not where I am. To me, distance is distance. She was kind of nervous about it because now we wouldnt see each other for 2 months or so at a time. I was fine with it too cause if I was going to spend the rest of my life with this girl, this little time apart would be great. When she left, Carlos went to New Orleans & attempt number 2 at a friendship began. She justified it because they were in different parts of the country & wouldn't be seeing each other etc. I was fine with it. Then 1 week she tells me, "Hey, Carlos is coming up for a music club he's in at school." I said, "Fine, I don't care if you guys get together for lunch or w/e or go out in a big group to a club or w/e but I don't want you being alone with him or him going to your dorm or anything like that." She argued with me etc. I asked her what her friendship with him was like & she explained that they were just friends & she would talk to him about things, specially us like when we would fight she would go to him for advice & that he was always "on my side" so I shouldn't be worried. W/e I let this whole thing slide. When he's there, the first day actually, her & me are talking & I ask her what she's going to do that night. She says she's going out. I ask with who. She says the girls. I ask if any guys are going. She says yea. I ask if Carlos is going. She says she doesn't know yet. I tell her to text message me if he does just so i know & I don't get caught by surprise. She gets upset & tells me, "You know what, I'm going to bring him back to my room & **** him." I hung up on her (something I never do). She gets drunk & texts me & calls saying how much she loves me & bla bla bla. I refuse to talk to her for the rest of the weekend this kid is there. I also had the kid call me to talk to him man to man & get his side of this whole friendship (I forgot to mention he has a gf throughout all this). We talk & I cleared up that it wasn't him that I had a problem with but the fact that she was friends with an ex. It could be any guy & I'd still be upset, so it wasn't personal. He says he understands & that he would feel the same way & all this crap. I don't tell her I talked to him because I don't want to make it seem like I want brownie points. He leaves, she calls, we talk, she apologizes for what she said, everything is ok. The next weekend was Easter & we would be seeing each other so I dropped it. That Thursday before Easter weekend she lied to me about something else. We got in a fight again & she apologized when I got there & everything was cool. Then that Saturday we got in a fight about Carlos. I asked her what she was going to do about that because it was getting out of hand, specially with what she said. We got in a huge fight & ended up breaking up.
For a month or 2 I tried talking some sense into her & patching things up. Turns out Carlos ended his friendship with her because it was getting in the way of his relationship with his gf & all that. Convenient timing, right? I always told her that what this kid wanted was to break us up & that was it. That if he was ever in the same situation, he would never fight for the friendship as much as she did. We had a Disney trip planned for the beginning of summer, cancelled that. We didn't talk for the beginning of the Summer because I was in Gainesville & she was in Miami. I came down for the second half of the summer & we started bumping into each other out at clubs & stuff. We ended up starting to talk again & then eventually hanging out as friends, then it became more, but she wasn't sure if she'd want to get back in the Fall. We kept hanging out & eventually went to Disney together. We had a blast, everything was great. It was like we were together without the title. She was telling me she loved me & wanted to marry me & could see us coming to Disney with our kids & all that stuff. She talked to me about what she wanted to name our kids & everything was great. We got back to Miami, hung out some more.
Then 1 day when I was at her house, she told me she needed to sign up for a CPR class. I was going to take a CPR/AED certification class with the Red Cross so I told her about it & she said we should take it together. She gave me her laptop (a Mac) & told me to sign her up while she showered. I don't know my way around Mac's so I was clicking pretty much everything in that little toolbar trying to find the internet when I stumbled upon some saved AOL conversations. Some of which were with a guy named Eddie that goes to school with her in Chicago. She had asked me if anything had happened with me when we were apart & I told her the truth. I asked her & she said no. Turns out she had been with this kid while we were apart, so she lied to me abou that. I wasn't mad she had been with him, but that she lied to me about it & gave me **** about the people I had been with. Then I found a conversation with Carlos she had saved. In the conversation he asks he if she's going to tell me about what happened & she says no, & she doesn't plan on ever telling me. The conversation went on & he told her how she should be single & all this crap. Then he told her he loved her & she said she did too & that she couldn't wait to be with him in the future & have kids & all this crap & how she'd wait for him & how I was only temporary & so was his gf & all that. I of course was upset. I talked to her about it. She said nothing happened & that he manipulated her & took advantage of the fact that we were fighting so much & told her what she wanted to hear/was the way I was all fun & carefree & crazy even though hes not really liked that & pretty much tricked her into things & that she really regrets it all & that it was super stupid. Over the course of a few days I kept finding out more & more & she kept denying & denying. Finally, she tells me the truth. Here it is: He went to see her, not for school. They scammed. He said her loved her, she said she loved him. They held hands stuff like that. That's it. Same with Eddie except the emotional part, she admits he was a rebound.
We stop talking, she changed her number, etc. I said some very horrible things, even calling her a lying **** (I have never said this but between being super upset & the Sopranos it just came out). I apologized for everything & how I acted & what I said. I told her instead of letting my feelings get the best of me I should've just walked away & that was it. I apologized again & again & she said she was sorry about what happened & that she really regrets it & wishes it didn't happen & that I didn't deserve any of it, etc. She hasn't really done anything to make things better & by the looks of things, she doesn't plan to. It seems like she's planning on taking me out of her life & moving on. She says that she really felt the way she said at Disney for me & that everything with Carlos was built on a lie & his manipulations. She says it was her fault too because she should've listened to me & not have been friends with him in the first place. She says she didn't tell me cause she didn't want to hurt me & she didn't tell me about Eddie because she didn't want me to feel the way she does when I tell her about the people I've been with. She says not a day goes by that she doesn't think about me & that she doesn't regret what she's done.
Now, I don't know what to think. I don't know if the past 2 & a half years & Disney were a lie & the truth finally came out or if the past 2 & a half years & Disney were real & what happened was just a huge mistake. I don't know what to make of this anymore & I need help. I love the girl, I really do. I've always told myself though that I would never get back with a girl that cheated on me. I never, not once, cheated on her & believe me I had the chances. This girl really meant a lot to me & I really did love her with all I could. I don't know what else to say or do? What do you guys think? Sorry about the length. I'll add in later if there's anything I'm missing.
I was with my ex gf for 2 & a half years. When we met everything was great (the honeymoon stage). We met right before I left to school at UF in Gainesville, FL. She's a year younger than me so she was satying in Miami, FL. We were together for 4 months before I left & everything was amazing. When we met & started talking she told me she had cheated on all her bf's before (I think it was 3 of them). Nothing really serious, just a kiss or scam or w/e with another guy while going out with her bf. I knew her most recent ex Carlos because he went to my high school. They were together for 10 months but when her & me got together, she hated him & told me about their relationship which made me hate him too (things like he almost hit her a few times etc). I went to UF, we stayed together & did the long distance hoping that when the time came she'd come up too. For a year I went up & down between Gainesville & Miami to be with her & spend weekends & stuff (I even missed the UF vs LSU game to surprise her for her birthday). I was seriously the "ideal" bf to this girl. I mean, even her friends told her, Lindsey, this kid is amazing, I wish I had a bf like that. She would always tell me how great of a bf I was, how much she loved me, how lucky she was, how I was her Noah (the guy from The Notebook), & all that kind of crap. I fell in love with her too, & loved & cared for her a hell of a lot. I considered her my best friend second to only my family then followed by my 2 best guy friends since I was 3 yrs old. She was with me through my dad's heart surgeries & mom's breast cancer & surgeries & I was with her through her mom's alcoholism & rehab. Basically, we were everything to each other. She felt like I was it, the one, the real deal & I felt like she was too. While we were apart, Carlos began telling her how much he had changed from when he was with her & how he wanted a friendship with her. I was against it but I told her it was her decision & that as soon as any funny business happened, it was over. They would talk & hang out occasionally & her & me fought a lot about him. She ended up calling it off cause it was getting to a point where she felt like she had to choose between him & me.
As luck would have it, she ended up going to Chicago instead of Gainesville. When she was leaving we decided to do the distance again. I was fine with it because to me its the same thing no matter where she is as long as its not where I am. To me, distance is distance. She was kind of nervous about it because now we wouldnt see each other for 2 months or so at a time. I was fine with it too cause if I was going to spend the rest of my life with this girl, this little time apart would be great. When she left, Carlos went to New Orleans & attempt number 2 at a friendship began. She justified it because they were in different parts of the country & wouldn't be seeing each other etc. I was fine with it. Then 1 week she tells me, "Hey, Carlos is coming up for a music club he's in at school." I said, "Fine, I don't care if you guys get together for lunch or w/e or go out in a big group to a club or w/e but I don't want you being alone with him or him going to your dorm or anything like that." She argued with me etc. I asked her what her friendship with him was like & she explained that they were just friends & she would talk to him about things, specially us like when we would fight she would go to him for advice & that he was always "on my side" so I shouldn't be worried. W/e I let this whole thing slide. When he's there, the first day actually, her & me are talking & I ask her what she's going to do that night. She says she's going out. I ask with who. She says the girls. I ask if any guys are going. She says yea. I ask if Carlos is going. She says she doesn't know yet. I tell her to text message me if he does just so i know & I don't get caught by surprise. She gets upset & tells me, "You know what, I'm going to bring him back to my room & **** him." I hung up on her (something I never do). She gets drunk & texts me & calls saying how much she loves me & bla bla bla. I refuse to talk to her for the rest of the weekend this kid is there. I also had the kid call me to talk to him man to man & get his side of this whole friendship (I forgot to mention he has a gf throughout all this). We talk & I cleared up that it wasn't him that I had a problem with but the fact that she was friends with an ex. It could be any guy & I'd still be upset, so it wasn't personal. He says he understands & that he would feel the same way & all this crap. I don't tell her I talked to him because I don't want to make it seem like I want brownie points. He leaves, she calls, we talk, she apologizes for what she said, everything is ok. The next weekend was Easter & we would be seeing each other so I dropped it. That Thursday before Easter weekend she lied to me about something else. We got in a fight again & she apologized when I got there & everything was cool. Then that Saturday we got in a fight about Carlos. I asked her what she was going to do about that because it was getting out of hand, specially with what she said. We got in a huge fight & ended up breaking up.
For a month or 2 I tried talking some sense into her & patching things up. Turns out Carlos ended his friendship with her because it was getting in the way of his relationship with his gf & all that. Convenient timing, right? I always told her that what this kid wanted was to break us up & that was it. That if he was ever in the same situation, he would never fight for the friendship as much as she did. We had a Disney trip planned for the beginning of summer, cancelled that. We didn't talk for the beginning of the Summer because I was in Gainesville & she was in Miami. I came down for the second half of the summer & we started bumping into each other out at clubs & stuff. We ended up starting to talk again & then eventually hanging out as friends, then it became more, but she wasn't sure if she'd want to get back in the Fall. We kept hanging out & eventually went to Disney together. We had a blast, everything was great. It was like we were together without the title. She was telling me she loved me & wanted to marry me & could see us coming to Disney with our kids & all that stuff. She talked to me about what she wanted to name our kids & everything was great. We got back to Miami, hung out some more.
Then 1 day when I was at her house, she told me she needed to sign up for a CPR class. I was going to take a CPR/AED certification class with the Red Cross so I told her about it & she said we should take it together. She gave me her laptop (a Mac) & told me to sign her up while she showered. I don't know my way around Mac's so I was clicking pretty much everything in that little toolbar trying to find the internet when I stumbled upon some saved AOL conversations. Some of which were with a guy named Eddie that goes to school with her in Chicago. She had asked me if anything had happened with me when we were apart & I told her the truth. I asked her & she said no. Turns out she had been with this kid while we were apart, so she lied to me abou that. I wasn't mad she had been with him, but that she lied to me about it & gave me **** about the people I had been with. Then I found a conversation with Carlos she had saved. In the conversation he asks he if she's going to tell me about what happened & she says no, & she doesn't plan on ever telling me. The conversation went on & he told her how she should be single & all this crap. Then he told her he loved her & she said she did too & that she couldn't wait to be with him in the future & have kids & all this crap & how she'd wait for him & how I was only temporary & so was his gf & all that. I of course was upset. I talked to her about it. She said nothing happened & that he manipulated her & took advantage of the fact that we were fighting so much & told her what she wanted to hear/was the way I was all fun & carefree & crazy even though hes not really liked that & pretty much tricked her into things & that she really regrets it all & that it was super stupid. Over the course of a few days I kept finding out more & more & she kept denying & denying. Finally, she tells me the truth. Here it is: He went to see her, not for school. They scammed. He said her loved her, she said she loved him. They held hands stuff like that. That's it. Same with Eddie except the emotional part, she admits he was a rebound.
We stop talking, she changed her number, etc. I said some very horrible things, even calling her a lying **** (I have never said this but between being super upset & the Sopranos it just came out). I apologized for everything & how I acted & what I said. I told her instead of letting my feelings get the best of me I should've just walked away & that was it. I apologized again & again & she said she was sorry about what happened & that she really regrets it & wishes it didn't happen & that I didn't deserve any of it, etc. She hasn't really done anything to make things better & by the looks of things, she doesn't plan to. It seems like she's planning on taking me out of her life & moving on. She says that she really felt the way she said at Disney for me & that everything with Carlos was built on a lie & his manipulations. She says it was her fault too because she should've listened to me & not have been friends with him in the first place. She says she didn't tell me cause she didn't want to hurt me & she didn't tell me about Eddie because she didn't want me to feel the way she does when I tell her about the people I've been with. She says not a day goes by that she doesn't think about me & that she doesn't regret what she's done.
Now, I don't know what to think. I don't know if the past 2 & a half years & Disney were a lie & the truth finally came out or if the past 2 & a half years & Disney were real & what happened was just a huge mistake. I don't know what to make of this anymore & I need help. I love the girl, I really do. I've always told myself though that I would never get back with a girl that cheated on me. I never, not once, cheated on her & believe me I had the chances. This girl really meant a lot to me & I really did love her with all I could. I don't know what else to say or do? What do you guys think? Sorry about the length. I'll add in later if there's anything I'm missing.
