Jordan, You already know me and my reasons, but I will share this with the group. I must say, that as I am recovering from my hernia surgery the last 30 plus days, not lifting, it is even more evident to me.
My primary goal with training is physical health and longevity. But it is also an outlet for or replacement for my addictive and semi-obsessive behavior. I am a recovering alcoholic addict who has had 53 months sobriety (end of this month). I have used all of the areas of a bodybuilding lifestyle as an outlet for my addictive and obsessive tendencies. Everything from diet, training, and everything in between revolves around the disciplines of bodybuilding.
All of my food consumptions and timing revolve around training and my goals from and for training. I also use the setting of goals and the disciplines required to achieve them as a catalyst to believe in myself and my ability to achieve goals ouside of bodybuilding. Everything from discipline, perserverence, planning, scheduling, commitment etc, etc that are paramount to a successful bodybuilding goal are transferred to some areas of my personal life outside of bodybuilding. I make sure to always be training for a goal of some slight degree or another. With that comes detailed logs and diet and so on. Not having those leaves me without a sense of pupose in my day. This at times can carry over into other areas of my life.
As of recent, I have self induced a period of no training, at all, to allow my hernia to heal very very completely. I have had it (henia) for several to many years and intend to never get one or re-aggrevate this one again. As a result of not training many areas of my life are falling to pieces little by little. My eating schedule is off because I no longer have my routine of pre/post shakes and meals that revolve around my training. I no longer have my waking and training discipline as well. This means my sleep routine is out of order as well. Most discouraging is the lack of sense of 'well being' that comes with the endorphines and other feel good hormones that come from a solid work out. The recomposition of my body is also a negative as well. I have not gained 'weight' but a negative recomposition is taking place. Less muscle volume from glycogen storage and more retention around my waist line.
Being very aware of my mental/psychological make-up, my substance abuse recovery and being an endo make bodybuilding the perfect vehicle for me to make positive movement through many areas in my life. I have looked at my obsessivenes in the area of bodybuilding and I seriously considered that too much of a good thing could indeed be a bad thing. I did taper off a bit and loosen up on training and diet from time to time. With it came the absence of the movement in a forward direction (achieving goals) that I cherish from this sport. It was more like just going through the motions. Today, having not trained for over a month and not practiced all the disciplines that come with it I feel like crap menatlly and physically. I will trade the potential downsides of the obsessiveness that may be inherent to the sport over the downsides of not being actively practicing it.
What bodybuilding did for me and why I train:
Those are not recent pictures of course. I am quite a bit bigger, a lot balder, quite a bit older and currently not as lean. But am still sober, a much healthier (mentally and physically) father to that little girl as well as my 16 and 18 year old son and daughter.
Anyway, I needed to see those to remind me that I can do anything when I pactice the bodybuilding discipline as a lifestyle.
, i dont want to accept the fact that im going to have to age like a fine bottle of wine and let old age get the best of me.
