buttered bread and cats

Beelzebub

Beelzebub

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originally posted by Apljuc on MMI.

Question: If, when you drop a buttered piece of bread, it always drops butter side down and a cat always lands on its feet, what would happen if you took a piece of buttered bread, strapped it on the back of a cat (butter side up) and dropped it?

Answer: Even if you are too lazy to do the experiment yourself you should be able to deduce the obvious result. The laws of butterology demand that the butter must hit the ground, and the equally strict laws of feline aerodynamics demand that the cat can not smash it's furry back. If the combined construct were to land, nature would have no way to resolve this paradox. Therefore it simply does not fall.

That's right you clever mortal (well, as clever as a mortal can get), you have discovered the secret of antigravity! A buttered cat will, when released, quickly move to a height where the forces of cat- twisting and butter repulsion are in equilibrium. This equilibrium point can be modified by scraping off some of the butter, providing lift, or removing some of the cat's limbs, allowing descent.

Most of the civilized species of the Universe already use this principle to drive their ships while within a planetary system. The loud humming heard by most sighters of UFOs is, in fact, the purring of several hundred cats.

The one obvious danger is, of course, if the cats manage to eat the bread off their backs they will instantly plummet. Of course the cats will land on their feet, but this usually doesn't do them much good, since right after they make their graceful landing several tons of red- hot starship and irritated aliens crash on top of them.

:lol:
 
bioman

bioman

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....and there's another 55 seconds of my life that I will never get back.

j/k lol
 

Strateg0s

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A few weeks ago I had something strange happen: I dropped a piece of buttered bread, and it landed.... on its side, and stood there - upright. All I could do was howl in laughter.
 
DmitryWI

DmitryWI

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A few weeks ago I had something strange happen: I dropped a piece of buttered bread, and it landed.... on its side, and stood there - upright. All I could do was howl in laughter.
You eat butter? Was it fat free butter?:icon_lol: Seriosly, There is explanation to that. You simply put some butter on the side of the bred and didn't notice, so it's still landed on the butter side:lol:
 

Lean One

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I don't know what's more pathetic. You cat lovin' butter eaters, or the fact that I read this thread all the way to the bottom. :blink: :think:
 

chasec

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don't feel bad. i read 1 more post in it than you did. guess i'm the "biggest loser"
 
DmitryWI

DmitryWI

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And not that you read only, but you take your time to post in this thread. Go get a life! (can I come?):drunk:
 

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